


Silver Bullets & Italian Shoes

by Avirra



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Episode s05e17 - Solitary Man, Halloween, Halloween Costumes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-16
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-20 23:01:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6028680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avirra/pseuds/Avirra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Garcia decides to throw a different type of costume party to celebrate the season.  Will it spoil one of Spencer's favorite holidays? (Mild profanity)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Silver Bullets & Italian Shoes

**Author's Note:**

> As a time note - this story would have occurred in October 2010.

**"Clothes make a statement. Costumes tell a story."** ~Mason Cooley

* * *

"Garcia - "

"Don't get whiney on me, my darling little genius. You and I both know that you love All Hallow's Eve."

"It's not that. I mean you aren't having your party on All Hallow's Eve, you're having it on the Saturday before."

"And?"

"And there's going to be a showing of back-to-back Vincent Price films that night that I'd wanted to go to."

"Much as I adore Uncle Vinnie films, my little chick, I do recall hearing a certain brown eyed profiler saying after the last time a certain omnipotent tech goddess provided him with desired information that he - and I quote - 'owed one' to said tech goddess. This is that self-same tech goddess calling in on that which she is owed. Don't pout, precious - there will be other double-features in your future."

Garcia gave her fluorescent orange bag a shake, then she offered the bag out to Reid. He eyed it rather dubiously.

"Exactly what am I drawing for?"

"Everyone is going to be paired with someone else randomly. So first, you draw to see who you're going to be teamed with. Then we move to bag number two and you pick out which famous team the two of you get to portray. Come on, my junior G-man - you've practically got first pick."

Seeing that he wasn't going to escape as Garcia shook her bag again, Reid just sighed and reached in. Pulling out a slip, he read off the name. Well, may be this wouldn't be so bad.

"Derek Morgan."

"Oopsy - the Chocolate Beefcake shouldn't still be in there. He caught me on my way over to you and already drew the name of his partner."

Crumpling up that slip of paper, Garcia shook the bag again. Reid plucked out another slip.

"Spencer Reid. Does that equal a 'get out of jail free' card?"

"No, it most certainly does not. However, since you're drawing for your partner now, we need to go ahead and remove you from the Bag of Fate any way. And since Derek is that only other one who's drawn a name, the third time is bound to be the charm."

A quick reach and grab, then Reid unfolded the slip and groaned when he read the name.

"Someone please just shoot me now instead of prolonging this."

"Let the Wondrous Oracle see - David Rossi?"

To give her credit, Garcia did give the young genius a sympathetic pat before reaching for a fluorescent green bag.

"Time to choose the famous pairing. There are no wrong picks in here, sweetums."

Reid thought that was certainly a matter of opinion. And his opinion was that the slip he was now stuck with could definitely have been better.

"Oooooooo - you lucked out! The Lone Ranger and Tonto!"

"Exactly how is that lucking out?"

"Well, my darling genius-kins, you could have drawn Popeye and Olive Oyl. Do either of us have any doubts which costume Rossi would have made you take in that equation?"

"If those were my choices, then I suppose that does rate as lucky. Why couldn't we just have picked our own famous pairs?"

"Because I didn't want a party half-full of Sherlock Holmes with the other half being Doctor Watson. In fact, that's one pair I didn't even include in the Bag of Mystery."

"Do I have to be the one to tell Rossi?"

"No, no. Your beloved and all-knowing Seer will do that. Now, if you will excuse me, I have more agents to waylay. Oh - and remember. Since you drew out the name of the pair, Rossi gets first dibs on who he wants to be."

Reid settled back down at his desk and Garcia zeroed in on her next target. He had the disconcerting feeling that he already knew which of the two that Rossi was going to pick. Which meant he was going to have to be Tonto. With a soft sigh, Reid turned to his computer. He was going to need to do some research. He was far more into Science Fiction than Westerns. While he'd heard of the Lone Ranger and Tonto, he knew practically nothing about them.

He was still researching when Rossi found him. Reid didn't even hear him coming until Rossi groaned as he looked over Reid's shoulder to see what he was studying.

"Let me guess - you never even watched the Lone Ranger, did you?"

"Well, no. Uhm - you have the pick. Have you decided?"

Rossi just nodded.

"Lone Ranger."

Reid just laughed slightly.

"What's so funny, Reid?"

"Did you ever watch the Lone Ranger, Rossi?"

"Hell yeah. Why?"

"Ever notice what his real name was?"

"What? Clayton Moore?"

"No, no. Not the actor. I mean, the guy's mother didn't just name him Lone Ranger."

Rossi narrowed his eyes a bit.

"No - can't say that I recall them ever mentioning that."

The team's resident genius just tapped the computer screen lightly. Rossi leaned a little closer to see what was being indicated and started laughing himself.

"Reid? The Lone Ranger's real name was Reid?"

"Apparently so."

"You're still Tonto."

"Figured as much, Kemo Sabe. "

Rossi made a noise that might have been a snort and headed back off to his office as Reid continued his reading. That one conversation was as much as the pair ever mentioned their joint Halloween costumes to one another.

* * *

On the night of the party, Reid was still debating the finishing touch on his costume while sitting in his car. He finally went with a single feather in the back of his headband because that was depicted in so much in artwork. Taking a last longing glance to the flyer in his car that advertised the movie double-feature, Reid exited his car and headed for the door.

He almost turned around and left immediately. The door was opened by Derek. Dressed as a sheep.

"I really shouldn't even ask, should I?"

"Get your feather on in here, Tonto. Lone Ranger's already been here awhile. And as for the costume, it was dress like this or Bo Peep. Which would you have gone for?"

"The sheep. So, who's your Bo Peep?"

"Let's just say Emily's trying to hide in the corner and leave it at that, hmm?"

Reid found a wooly arm being draped across a shoulder to be a bit of an odd sensation, but decided not to mention it. He could see Rossi leaning against a wall while having a drink, mask and all. Next to him, JJ apparently drew the Olive Oyl short straw.

"Hey kid, knowing you, you researched this whole Lone Ranger and Tonto bit, right?"

"Well - yeah. Why?"

"Curiosity. What does Kemo Sabe really mean?"

Shooting a look over to Rossi who was definitely looking back at the two of them now, Reid turned away slightly.

"I can tell you - but you have to promise not to tell Rossi?"

Derek glanced over to Rossi then looked back to Reid.

"I promise. You have my interest peaked. So?"

"It's a loose translation, of course, but basically it means 'cowboy who dresses funny'."

It took two beats before Derek started laughing hard. He hadn't been expecting something like that out of Reid. It took another two beats for that to get Garcia by his side trying to figure out what was getting him out of breath. Reid just gave 'Wicked Stepmother' Garcia a wide-eyed innocent look and a shrug to convey that he had no clue what was wrong with Derek as he then took advantage of her turning her attention back to the breathless 'sheep' and went in search of the coffee that he could smell but hadn't seen yet.

It was fairly clear to Rossi that something about him or his costume had been behind Derek's laughter. His eyes narrowed thoughtfully, but Reid was both apparently avoiding him as well as being a man on a mission.

Looking relatively comfortable in the guise of Popeye, Hotch got Reid's attention long enough to direct him to the coffee. Knowing her guests, Penelope had a generously sized container of sugar near the machine. Since Reid had given up movie night for her, she wanted to make sure he had ample amounts of sugary caffeine.

By now, Derek had caught his breath enough to pass along Reid's definition of Kemo Sabe to his baby girl. It was when she got a case of the giggles (more from who said it than from what was said) that Reid figured that it wouldn't take a whole lot longer for that to make it's way around the room and over to Rossi. Best then to get his sugar-laden coffee and find an empty seat on the far side of the room.

A glance at the time made him sigh. The Masque of the Red Death was about to start. 89 minute run time. There might possibly still be a chance to catch House of Wax if Garcia gave him time off for good behavior and let him leave in an hour. He could get to the theatre from here in fifteen minutes easy.

Breathing in the aroma from his mug, Reid felt a little guilty that he wasn't having a good time. It wasn't like he didn't enjoy being around his co-workers, but it also wasn't as if they didn't already spend a lot of time together. And parties? Well, they were just awkward for him all around. Especially as he was trying to give the impression that he was enjoying himself so that it wouldn't hurt Garcia's feelings that he wasn't.

"So you think I dress funny."

Caught up in his own thoughts, Reid hadn't noticed when Rossi came over and he nearly spilled his coffee when he startled. Then as the remark registered, he gave a small shrug.

"Technically, I didn't say anyone dressed funny. I just implied that Tonto thinks that the Lone Ranger dresses funny."

"I suppose so."

Taking another sip of the drink in his hand, Rossi gave Reid's costume a critical glance, but refrained from commenting on it. He had to admit to himself the fringed top did rather look like the Jay Silverheels version of Tonto. The comment he made had nothing to do with that, however.

"You seem to have been avoiding me this evening."

Reid looked down at his cup, then took a quick drink before he answered.

"I have been."

"Might I ask why?"

"Garcia's rules said we had to have the matching costumes. There was nothing said about having to stay next to one another, so I didn't see any point in ruining your evening."

"Come again?"

Taking another sip of his coffee, Reid gave Rossi a brief glance then let his eyes settle on the huge carved pumpkin Garcia had on the table.

"Rossi - I get it. You don't like me. That's not a big deal - hell, it puts you in the same category as the majority of people. We have to work together and I think we manage that fine for the most part. I'm not going to inflict myself on you away from the job."

He didn't respond immediately, he just studied the much younger man. Damn - Reid still looked like a kid to him even though he was what now? Thirty?

"What led you to decide I don't like you, Reid?"

There was a pause as Reid drained the last of the coffee from his cup and got to his feet. He didn't look back to Rossi when he finally spoke. His voice was soft, but firm.

"I guess it was when I discovered that I rated less consideration from you than your boots did."

He couldn't find a response to that. Rossi just watched silently as the young genius moved off and gave his apologies to Garcia for leaving early. He didn't miss the look Garcia shot his way even though he was certain Reid hadn't said anything to her about what had just happened.

Sighing, he took a sip of his drink again then looked back up to watch as Reid exited through the door. It didn't matter what his intentions or thoughts had been on that day at the ditch, it was what Rossi had done that had branded itself into a memory that never, ever forgets.

* * *

" **People may doubt what you say, but they will believe what you do."** ~Lewis Cass

 


End file.
